Friday, January 26, 2007

Pizza Boy Found

After Russ came home we decided to go out to eat at one of our favorite italian places. I had veal for the first time and wasn't really impressed with the flavor so I don't think i'll be ordering it again any time soon.

On the way home Russ asked if there was anything else that I wanted to do, I couldn't think of anything but he decided he wanted to pay a visit to a friend of ours at his workplace.

While living at our old place we had a friend in need staying with us (Jack) dealing with substance abuse and such. This friend had a coworker that he hung out with quite a bit (Danny) and was awesomely super hot, not to mention a very polite and cordial guy...only flaw is that he was straight.

Well he and our bud had a falling out, Jack moved and ended up going back to rehab and we really didn't get to see much more of Danny after that.

Well, this friend still had some of Russ' movies and Russ decided to pay a visit to his place of work. We dropped by and he was still there, by luck. We had a pretty good conversation. He's still hot as hell and doing his thing. We left him Russ' number and our address. He said he'd drop by soon with the movies and such. It was REALLY good to see him though. He is a good guy and I'm sad that we lost touch

Just finished watching the first Hawaii episode of "Top Chef" and am sooo sad that BOTH Elia and Sam were cut this round. I was hoping at least one of them would make it to the finals...but I have to deal with Marcel and Ilan. Not sure if I'll have any heart in this finale but I guess i'll be rooting for Marcel. He's kinda cute in an odd sorta way, and I believe in him a whole lot more than what Ilan presents.

Either way I'm not really excited about the finale. Bring on Amazing Race: All Stars and Survivor: Fiji.

Death of an IPod



I just went to transfer my first load of laundry over to the dryer and it's a sad sad day for me. While pulling items to the other machine I kept hearing this odd clanking and passed it off as the buttons from a pair of my pants hitting the metal on the side. Wasn't even close.

I began to pull a towel out and my heart just sank. My Ipod shuffle was dangling at the end, headphones tangled around a corner. The power light doesn't work, doesn't play and the computer doesn't even register it anymore. It's absolutely dead.

That's been my only source of music and entertainment on the road since the radio from my vehicle had gotten stolen, and was the very first item I had gotten for myself since I'd began working that second job last August.

I couldn't help but to tear up just a little. I'm not sure how to tell Russ and not feel more stupid than I do now. Apparently, when I changed to shower at the gym yesterday I put it in my shorts pocket instead of my bag like I usually do. I knew I should've checked my pockets. *sigh* Lesson learned.

Rest in peace my Ipod.

Out of Nowhere

Yesterday morning was kinda surreal. You see my vehicle's tags have been expired since the end of the year. Since it's really Russ' vehicle I can't just go out and get them myself. For a while I've been pushing Russ to run out and get them done but he's been at home for the past few days "sick." Russ' 'need to to stay home sick' is alot different than what I consider it.

He'll stay home for something as small as a headache and his job is very forgiving because of his prior medical history. Well anyways, like I said, i've been trying to get him to go out and get them for a while.

Well I get up and head out to the gym, I'm almost to the exit I need to turn off the interstate onto, and a policeman just swoops right in. I swear I was on the lookout the whole drive and the one time I take my eyes off of what's behind me..he comes up the middle lane and swoops right in- lights a blazing.

Long story short, he let me off but let me know that in these cases the driver gets nailed and not the owner. *sigh* so when I got home last night I like literally pushed the registration in his hand and said I need this tomorrow please.

I didn't get to go to the gym this morning because I'm just scared of getting caught again and having a $150 ticket to pay.

Besides all that mess, yeterday was alright. Long long day at work.

Best part of my day was that I finally saw a hot guy in the locker room versus all those old fat guys I'm so used to seeing. Turned the corner into the room and there he was sitting on the left, shirtless, tight little body, beautiful nipples. He already had his pants on so I was dissapointed there. If I hadn't been pulled over I probably woulda made it into to see his whole dressing routine *cry*

Oh well, I was still honored to be in the presence of his beauty. : P

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

The Amazing Race 2 - Footrace to the Finish

Finished watching the second season of Amazing Race on GSN and although I was totally wanting Danny and Oswald to make it (they were eliminated at position 4, just shy of the top three), I was really pulling for Blake and Paige (the brother/sister duo) would pull through. But I am glad that Chris and Alex pulled the win over Will and Tera, he was just a jerk and undeserving. I do have to say I like the track jacket Will had... and Danny and Oswald will have their chance again thanks to the next season of Amazing Race: All-Star Edition!!

The Heart Is Deceitful Above All Things

Russ wanted to see this video since it was part of the Sprouse boys former repertoire before "The Suite Life of Zack and Cody". I knew it was going to be kinda morbid and dark (as many independent films seem to be), and I wasn't disappointed. But let me tell you I actually enjoyed the movie, couldn't take my eyes off of it for an instant. There wasn't much character development through it but I felt a connection to each and every person on the screen. It's not a movie that I would purchase for repeat watchings but if you don't mind a movie with a clearly depressing overtone, this is a good find.

Marilyn Manson also appears in the movie outside of his usual "stage presence" and pulls his guest spot quite well.

...and who are you?

Picture this. I'm at work yesterday and coming down our main strip in my retail store and there's this couple walking toward me. I don't really take too much notice of them... just that it's an average, everyday-sort, young mother pushing a stroller and then there's some guy that's trailing along behind them.

She comes by me and stops to ask where the clearance areas are (actually she said "sale items", but I hate that expression since I believe all the merchandise is 'for sale', and what she's looking for is clearance). I inform her where the areas are, and immediately as she's turning toward one of the areas I pointed out, the guy with her gives me this oddly hip-hoptastic fake look and turns into the shop behind her. Not sure what the look was supposed to mean, but I think it was to try to intimidate me for some odd unknown reason... like the obviously gay boi working in the Old Navy is gonna be silently hitting on your girl with a secret clearance code signal.

Here's where my thoughts churned. He's a tall, skinny, pasty-skinned white guy. Real gawky and plain, but boy was decked out in classic stereotypical hip-hop flair. Wide-brimmed cap turned sideways, oversized basketball jersey over an oversized tshirt, white shorts reaching to about mid-calf (in my world those are wide-legged capris), the classic expensive athletic shoes which have no validity in any fashion taste, and to beat it all the over-exaggerated mannerisms of the stereotypical hip-hop person.

Now it's not my place to judge anyone on who they are, but my issue is when people are struggling for an identity and it's not them. He had all the must-have basics down but he was obviously not. Why do people try their hardest to be something they're not? Maybe it's because of his plain-ness that he's trying to hide behind this persona...thinking that if he can find someone who likes the persona he's trying to pull off, his actually looks and demeanor won't matter...

But is it worth it to be this false persona?? I know that I would love to be able to pull off the goth look and persona, but I know that I could never pull it off. You have to work within yourself, your life and your experiences to become yourself. Not tv, movies, music or whatever means.

Now some people actually do find themselves through these means. One of my very close friends found himself through music, but the difference is he became secure with himself, and everyone around him was secure with who he was despite us being different. He picked up the sort of emo/rock look and has completely transformed from someone with no identity at all to someone you totally believe. He hasn't strayed from us, he has picked up an additional circle of friends, but I'm very happy with his progress. And what's more is that it FITS him. And this comes from years of going clubbing with the boi and him trying to take on the club-boy look, which was totally not him or his personality, and i'm glad he figured it out.

But with the people like the guy I mentioned above, have you ever been around someone you know is just trying their hardest to be someone they're not. This was so obvious to me. His mannerisms didn't fit him, his clothing didn't fit him (literally as well lol), and just the whole aura he was trying to pursue was so definitely not him. What was even more odd was that who I assumed was his wife/girlfriend/friend/whatever was very casually/everyday dressed (i.e. so obviously not like him). Maybe it was that fact that made him stick out like a sore thumb, but I don't think so.

What's your call?

Friday, January 19, 2007

Catch that puppy!

The funniest and most heartbreaking thing happened today. Well, it's not that bad but pretty close. Russ had just got home from work and was dressing so that we could go out, eat and grab some groceries. He started to play with TJ (our cairn terrier) and decided to hook the hanger from his shirt onto her leash harness. She fumbled around for a few minutes trying to get it off and then went running off into the living room where I expected her to lose it somewhere and come back as happy as she came.

Instead, we heard the most heartbreaking yelping and whining. I was in a temporary state of shock and Russ was all like, "move!" We ran in there and she was fine but she just couldn't get it off of her and it scared her to death. We quickly removed it, scooped her up and gave her loving. It was the most heartbreaking yelping I've ever heard. Poor little girl. ; ; But she was just fine and no harm done. It just scared her that she couldn't lose the thing.

I didn't go to the gym yesterday because I got off around 7pmish, got to the parking lot and it was slammed. I didn't feel like waiting on each and every machine so since I was off today I decided to combine my workouts today. Went pretty well and I saw my first hot guy in like weeks. I was beginning to think all the hot ones got scared off or something.

If anyone happened to catch the latest episonde of "The Apprentice: Los Angeles" , it got about as gay as it could get. The two teams were supposed to work with a design team and company in designing a line of swim suits for buyers to bid on. Carey, a gay and buff member of last weeks losing team, took the reigns in designing the men's wear. What he came up with was a boy short looking spandex brief which would probably be seen in south beach somewhere versus anywhere USA. Their team lost and the numbers between the sales by the two teams was somewhere less than a thousand dollars. Finding out also that the women's suits contributed to a mass of the sales while the men's only worked for $300 of it. Not surprising Carey went to the boardroom and what ensued was hilarious talks of "gay suits" etc.

I also got word on who the teams are gonna be for the next Amazing Race which is going to be an All-Star edition, bringing back teams from former seasons and I have to tell you that I am super excited. Team Guido, Danny & Oswald, Unchenna & Joyce, Rob & Kim, Dave & Mary...*giddy*

Well that's it for right now!

Sunday, January 14, 2007

Austin Miller et. al.

Just got through watching the latest episode of "Grease: You're the One that I Want" and for anyone that's on the wavelength that I am... Austin Miller is the freakin' hot talented bomb. ^^ Which I'm sure whoever is editing the show was hoping for. Just wanted to put his name down in a tangible form because I haven't been able to find anything yet. I was hoping some hotshot put his scenes up on YouTube already, but alas I haven't found them.

If anyone finds anything let me know : P

In other news today Greg offered me his chicken bites, which seemed to me like a big step in getting to know him. He reached out to me at that point and I was like 'wow, he doesn't dislike me'. He actually smiled too! I know I'm in a relationship and there's no doubt that he's heard about it by now (not to mention he's straight and has a girlfriend)... but the attention from him is nice and I hope to interact with him more.

Russ was wonderful today. We went to the mall to eat and boywatch (which is so fun and romantic at the same time)... you'd just have to know how open and secure we are together. Then we walked around and Russ actually got new clothes!!! *gasp* He and I were so excited (or he was just faux-excited because I was. Either way I don't care.).

Well, the rest of the week I work a basic midshift 930 till 6pm and I really don't want to be at the gym at 7ish so I'm gonna give getting there around 7am a try. Hopefully it'll work out for me.

Probably the best time for me to go because I'm not wore out already, but my energy may not be all there... it may take me a bit to get my groove. But at least I'm sticking to it.

*HUGS* till tomorrow.

Thought of the night: I've yet to be smitten by anyone as buff as this Austin Miller, it's still surprising to me, but man...YUM

Saturday, January 13, 2007

A Resolution or Two

What a long frickin' night at work. Usually when I'm working on my job specific areas it just flies by, but when we're short-handed and I'm pulling work in the main spots it just drags. Well, thankfully it's over. One more day of the clearance sale and it'll calm down again thankfully.

Both Wade and Greg were there today and I couldn't have done any more drooling. Greg with his tight shirt and tight little bod, or Wade with his thin white shirt showing the outline of his tank top underneath, leaving me to imagine the shaps and curves of his torso. *sigh* and *yum*

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I know it's a couple of weeks late but I want to go ahead and put down my resolutions for the year to come. I don't really believe I'll be able to keep up with them all, as I've never been completely faithful to the concept of a resolution (then again, who else has..).

First I want to keep up with my gym time and work out regimine. I was doing pretty good for about 8 months straight, then I took on that second job for about 4 months and fell out of the swing. I've started again and am so happy I have. I'm feeling better about myself and my future.

Next I want to keep up with my journal as I mentioned earlier. I really enjoy the writing and the consistent putting words down will help keep my mind fresh. Not to mention I can look back on things as I need them. I'm still considering bringing my past blog entries into this one. I havent seen that option yet but I'm sure I can. The ease of adjusting this blog is just to tomepting not to love.

And finally I want to start investing myself back into my faith and craft. I've fallen into a deep slump of almost forgetting the little things of my beliefs that build it's character and depth and that's sad. I'm vowing to put in at least an hour's worth of studying a day. I'm not sure I'll be able to stick to it, but I sure will give it a try.

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I'm still trying to decide on a time to take down the tree. It just doesn't seem appropriate to do it yet. I'll probably do it during one of the final days of this month.

Well, fits of tiredness are coming upon me so I guess I'll call it a night.

Alpha Dog

I don't know what it is but the more I see this preview, the more I want to see the movie. Justin actually looks like he may be playing a believable character. I'll just have to see.

All those who just automatically label his Nsync past to him need to move on as much as he did. Grow up and stop allowing biases to keep you from an open mind to the current work. Sad close-minded folks. *shakes head*

Friday, January 12, 2007

A Social Night at Last! ^^

Gah. Ive been so grumpy this morning and I hate feeling this way. Especially since this is my last off day this week... was wanting to get some things done like I did on Wednesday. Got this feeling right in the center of my head like there's a pressure there...an idea or worry pressing on me that I haven't recognized and is trying to gain my attention.

Didn't go to the gym this morning like I was hoping but it wouldn't have been a good experience considering my mindset. And what's funny is I say, "my mindset", but I'm not really sure what my mindset is...it's just that pressure keeping me from having a positive feeling. Blah

Russ got a call from his friend's mom the night before catching up. We hadn't seen her since our friend Derek's Christmas party the year before. The short and long was that she was finally getting a divorce from her slob of a boyfriend. Such a good thing for her. Anyways, she asked if we could come by Derek's the next night as a surprise and hang out and catch up. He said we would and surprisingly enough he came home and pulled through. We showered together, got dressed and headed out to eat. He let me choose and we went to the Roadhouse for dinner before heading over to his place. My lord there are some beautiful bois who work at that place.

We arrive at Derek's to find out his mother left about 5 minutes before we arrived literally because she wasn't feeling well or something,. Later we find out she's feeling loads better now simply because she finally made her husband get those divorce papers. She literally picked them up at the courthouse with a smile on her face and excitement in her heart.

As for the rest of the night, it was a very fun night of conversation. We rarely get out to be social and it was much neeeded.

We did finally get to watch "The Exorcism of Emily Rose". Very good movie and I would recommend it to anyone. Very cerebral and the special effects added so much to the story without making things over the top.

We were there from 5 to about 2:30am and Russ' energy stayed strong the whole night. Was a very fun night. I was hoping we'd leave about 10ish and maybe go to the club, but this social experience with Derek and his beau was very fulfilling.. a good night.

It's now Saturday and I have another couple of hours before going into work. Bah I need to eat ^^ Talk to ya soon!

"When you put so much effort into hating your day job, it's easy not to notice you're learning something." Dead Like Me - "Vacation"

Monday, January 8, 2007

Choices Choices

Well as first entries in a journal have to go... I have to say this won't be most memorable one but I'm just gonna pretend like I'm continuing on from one of my other journals (so work with me here lol).

I do need to keep up with my journal, it's my New Year's Resolution to myself. You know why? Because it'll help keep me thinking. I've found myself becoming content and not ... oh what's the word (see my point)... not excercising my brain as much. Keeping up my journal will at least keep me audible and thinking...especially since I'm overly critical of how I write things.

My other goal for this year is to keep up my weight training. I enjoy it, I just feel out of my pattern when I took up that second job in October. I was good for a while but began missing my home time and forsaked my training time between jobs to spend that 30mins at home with my beau while he was awake and sober. I really have a fire to do it, just need to get my motivation going. Tomorrow is the brand new day to make myself start again. I wish I had a symbolic "bikini" to hang on my wall to motivate myself, but the closest thing I can come up with is an image of a boy I wished I looked like...and that to me is a bit far-fetched.

But if I could look like anyone it would be Brent Corrigan. So beautiful, my dream guy. I need more of him in my porn library *sigh*.

Work went well today, promotions were actually fun, and coming back from 3 days off I've found people have done tasks for me as a way to relieve me. I see that as a great sign of respect and I'm flattered.I really put a dent into the damaged and such today...especially considering the holiday markdowns and events pushed me back 3 weeks.

Just a note, Greg is hot!! >> Just don't tell Samantha : P

Tonight was another quiet night at home. Which is a thankful thing, since oddly Russ and I have had our differences lately about miniscule things. Not sure whether it's me or him but it's happened regardless.

I'm soooo thankful the new season (or episodes) of programs are coming into play. Past seasons of Amazing Race being run on the Game Show Network shouldn't be my excitement coming home.I originally thought "Grease: You're the One that I Want" was going to be kinda campy and stupid (which truthfully, I kinda thought about "Grease" as a whole, ). But I'm a musical theatre fan and watched it anyway, and even despite the stupid "you're the one I want.." suspense line, I really enjoyed and got interested in watching this show. Really anticipating it. : D

And as any new season of shows comes, my lack of a dual-tuner tivo.. I have to make a choice when things coincide. Whoah, big decision here (the suspense is crazy), the "Desperate Housewives" or "Apprentice: LA"? Sorry Tracy (my 'Housewives" bud at work), I'm going to have to go with the Apprentice.

I'm a Reality- freak and the personal aspect and getting to know people and their ways (even if it is edited) excites me. And the business oriented aspect of watching these people interact excites me like it did last season. The only thing I was really looking forward to on "Housewives" was seeing where Bree's and her son's storyline would end up. Here's hoping I can catch reruns later. Sorry Tracy ><.

Just finished watching a new "Drake and Josh". Mmmm Drake Bell is just too hot. Last night Russ finally spent his Xmas money from his sis and got him a new DVD player and the "Pirates of the Caribbean II" DVD. He also let me have my choice of something as a Xmas present (since I was presentless from him -- he just didn't think we had the money, and hey, I control the finances so I know he would have had to fight hard not for me to notice). I decided on getting the "High School Musical" Remix DVD and am so happy with my choice. I believe it's gonna be on my "watch anytime" movie list soon. Such a fun and timeless movie. We were hoping to get it in widescreen but after I think 5 dvd renditions of it and still being in full screen.

Zac Efron is freaking hot and it's just too sweet. Well I guess I believed I've wrote enough.

Night all! And I'll end this like I usually ended my former blogs with a quote I heard today.

Quote of the Day: "...and we'll call it 'Cup of Stuff'!"