Majority Does Not Rule

The other night I went to my favorite club for the first time in probably 2 months or so and to tell you the truth, it was a big letdown for me. The main reason I went is so I could dance. I love to dance and since I'm adamant here lately about getting myself into regular cardio with the spin class and cycling after my workouts, I felt a need to get back out and start dancing again (the music and hot guys don't hurt either).

But boy was I wrong, just like the last time I went a few months ago, attendance was down to at least a quarter of what it used to be (very light crowds). The amateur show which was usually overflowing with interested young drag queens had been cancelled on both occasions and the regular cast performed on their own. Not that it's a bad thing, just shows that that the interest either isn't there anymore or they've moved on elsewhere. Not only that, but I was the only fricken person dancing on the floor until the hour before close. So depressing.

I also had an ethical dilemma going on...so here's the backstory in a nutshell:

-favorite club is the oldest in city and resides very close to the University.
-University builds new student apartments and parking garage basically on the club's backdoor. Ever since this happened I've been very uncomfortable walking to the club ...an awful short walk for any college brats with a thing against gay bois to prove whatever it is they wanna prove.
-There was an attempt by the university to buy the property but i think that fell through.
-Management tried to clean up it's ghetto-Babylonisque atmosphere (QAF reference) by posting rules governing clothing oneself and what you couldn't wear in the bar.
-Since then attendance has been down and the club has been hurting financially.

Besides all that, I've come to find the straight crowd kinda...taking over. Easily being the majority. The best of which were 4 straight valley girls taking up the dance floor and fraternizing with the local wildlife in that "petting zoo" fashion. I can just hear them the next day, "we got to dance with a gay guy last night, omg!!" Six of them, dancing in a circle and giggling at the surroundings.. "I can't believe we're here!".. that kinda thing. Bah, forgive my whining.

Now, don't get me wrong. I don't mind the straight folk enjoying our place of entertainment, but when they're the majority...there's something wrong. I don't know, I may need to start frequenting another club but that's a hard decision for me. This bar has been there for me for as long as I've been out. I've had so many memories take place there. It has always felt safe and very much like I was in a family atmosphere. Safe is still there, but the atmosphere has changed for me. I feel like a minority again and I shouldn't have to accept feeling that way. Vouching for acceptance in a place where I've always had that is a step I won't want to take.

It may seem that i'm making a mountain out of a molehill or expounding on a couple of isolated instances but I rarely ever get the opportunity to go out much anymore and the nights I have gone out have been very similar to this instance. Either my timing is on par or this has been a consistent thing.

I think I'll take Russ' advice and try the Rainbow Club next. It's kinda homey in a small pub type atmosphere and is bound to have way more gay life than the Carousel has had as of late. Or maybe Kurt's, they have an awesome outside seating area and this is a good time of year to take advantage of that. In fact, I think I'll do that.

Distraction - My Favorite Word

It's funny how things work at times. The last few days it's been kinda hard for me to put a post together and it's made me think of my past and present blogs, and what it was that helped me stay focused.

I remember when I was taking classes at UT Knoxville and there were those times when had 2-3 hours in between classes. You know those times when the only options you had were early classes and late classes because all the ones with decent hours got snatched up. Anyways, I hate driving in the first place, nonetheless make a 45minute drive 4 times a day...so I would kill time in one of the computer labs spread around the campus.

Posts seemed to flow so freely from that space. Maybe it was that kinda silence one can only achieve in a library/lab type atmosphere? The silently hum of the air conditioning, the tapping of nearby keyboards, the clacking of people refilling the copiers with paper and softly greeting each other. Was it the emanations of intelligent (or pseudo-intelligent for some) thought that seeped into me to help push me into my own.

The more I think about it, I believe it all comes down to distractions. The atmosphere of those computer labs and the serene way it allowed me to free my thoughts and competently write them was accomplished because I was able to free myself from distraction.

The humming, whispering, tapping and clacking were there the whole time, but they were just background noise. They lingered just close enough to remind me that I was still in the real world, but my mind was able to filter all this out and concentrate on putting down the words I wanted on the proverbial electronic paper.

Fast forward to right now. For the last 3 days I've had great ideas for blog entries. I'd sit down, start writing (making some decent progress in some) and then it would all go blank. Just like the floor was pulled out from under me. And this bothered me.

Where I currently type has way too many distractions. With the television and random conversation going between our roommate and the beau, it's usually too loud to filter and of it without losing my train of though.

I find myself wishing I had a laptop and could just wander out into the backyard, sit down underneath the tree there and type with the full knowledge it would flow easier that way. But that's not going to happen, so what else can I do to give myself that kind of environment.

What I've come up with seems to be working. I may not be able to filter the noise around me, but I can dampen it. My mind also seems to be less prone to distraction when I'm listening to music, particularly house/trance/etc. So while I'm typing I pop on the Itunes, and listen to music and i've effectively revisited the computer lab experience in a different but oddly similar way. Similar in the fact that it's allowing me the same focus. I'm very happy with this rationalization and "band-aid."

I know, I know. A post about posting, not too exciting but believe me I have like 3 unfinished posts to complete.

Bear with me, there's more to come! :D

Travis Wall

I have to say that I really love YouTube. After finding those videos of Ricky, I decided to see what I could find on my favorite from last year, Travis Wall. He was so hot and talented. He's got a great future ahead of him. These vids help me to remember how much I loved him. :P

Saying Goodbye to Ricky pt2

Saying Goodbye to Ricky

No, no, no. Of course I go and have to curse my favorite in the competition by promoting him from the start.



My boy Ricky was chosen to leave the competition tonight...and I am sooo disappointed and sad. It surprised how they felt his routine fell short of that breaker latin boy who relied on his floor spinning to save him. I know personality is an assett (much like with Benji last year) but the technique and diversity of routine needs to be there.

Ah, just let me vent and it will pass. He was so fricken hot and talented. Anyone that has any screen caps of the boy please send them my way! His experience on the show was way too short. *cry* Please aid me in honoring the premature exit of Ricky.

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As for the update in my world. Russ' went to the doctor a few days ago to find out what's wrong with his back. He's had two back and one neck surgery in the past and after viewing his xray results, he's found that he has a bulging disc pinching a nerve directly above the two discs he had already had surgery on.

He needs to get a ton of bloodwork done before there's a date for the operation, but hopefully this will bring the old Russ back and the prospect he'll start watching himself. He's not a young man anymore and needs to take care of his body. He's strongwilled and pig-headed and asking for help is not always easy for him, but hopefully I'll be able to help him past this.

This workweek has been exhausting for me. Resetting a number of departments in the store and working a full shipment today has left me real tired. I haven't been to the gym this week but I'll definitely be there tomorrow. Since I stayed an hour and a half over yesterday that means that I'll get to go home earlier tomorrow. Heck yeah! I've missed the gym.

I've really began to feel good about myself and my body. My clothes are fitting me so much better and it's bringing me new confidence in myself.

So, needless to say, I'm dissapointed in myself for not going this week. But, by gosh, I've been so tired. Anyways, have a good night all.

If It Were My Choice...

Alrighty, as any of my friends will know, I love "American Idol" but I rarely blog about it, but when it comes to "So You Think You Can Dance", I am just all about it.

These peops just amaze me everytime. I love to dance, but of course I will never be as good as these folk, but it is so very nice to watch. MTV envelops our minds to think that hip-hop and pop dance are the forms of acceptable social dance out there and this show helps to promote those other great forms of dance: i.e. latin, swing, jive, etc.

I also find it very nice that with these dances they're pushing versatility...and the most common-sensical thing to myself is that if you're wanting to make a living off of dance, being versed in many types would be the best way to keep yourself in work.

This is also coming from someone who has had one class in dance which really wasn't very explicit on a type...kinda modern, but like the Mia Michaels meets kindergarten type. And then a mix of gay club dance meets country-western techniques. I will admit going with my sister to a country/western bar for years and learning line dance really helped me to learn beat, precision and stylized moves. You'll be surprised how much it can help those unversed in dance feel better about themselves.

Anyways, nows my time to express my views for my favorites. I do have a couple of female favorites... Lauren and Sara being them, they are sweet...and Sara is just the bomb! But of course with this being a gay blog written by a gay man I'll have to focus on the hot bois I'm voting for. And believe me, I vote on talent or potential as well. Depending on what dance type they pick, the couple could be in or out of their element and we have to look at how they adapt versus those who were bred in that kind of dance environment.

Anyway, here's my top hotness factor picks.



Ricky has these great dark eyes and hair that just pull me in everytime I look at the boy. He's an awesome modern/contemporary type dance who was put into ballroom this time round, and I think the couple did well. His only issue is his girl partner is taller and stouter than he and it wasn't sure who was really leading during the whole bit. I think this boi can go a long way if the votes are there. He's my favorite, so give him the love!



OMG, Neil was adorable tonight doing the salsa, even if his posture was too high for the sensuality of the step it was still very much enjoyable. I love his look and his dance and he better not go soon.






Kameron is just fricken hot. He did a great contemporary/modern routine by Mia Michaels with Benji's sister and was awesome. So very very hot. I hope he goes very far. You know who he reminds me of, not sure if you all have seen "Bulletproof Monk", the guy that plays the British thug gang leader-guy...yeah, he reminds me of him, very hot and fuckable. *sigh*



Hok has been a favorite of mine since last year. When the pivotable moment came when he couldn't move on because of his work visa it made me sad. I'm so glad to see him come back and make it finally to the top 20. I have a thing for asian bois, but for an asian boi with a british accent....*swoon* I hope he goes far...very far.




I also have a soft spot for the ballroom dancer bois who appear on here. Last year it was so hot Stanislav, but hopefully Pasha won't meet the same early fate Stan did. He has an awesome body and gorgeous face and I wouldn't mind him holding me at any point an time during a waltz.




These are my fav bois, like 'em or lump 'em but VOTE for 'em to stay!!

Road Trip!

Oh my gosh, let me first tell you that I finally have Russ just one chapter away from finishing "Harry Potter and the Order of the Pheonix." It's been a long battle to get him ready before the movie hits theaters but we may actually get it done. I've been trying to finish the book with him for probably close to a year.

He surprised me today by taking us on a drive to pay on the boat slip and knowing the drive takes a bit I suggested bringing the book along just in case. Nine times out of ten, this scenario just ends with the book taking up space in the back seat.

This time, we were probably about 10 chapters away from finishing and he gives the go ahead. Russ loves (or used to love) to take long drives and roam around for the fun of it. I took advantage of this time and kept reading...and he just kept driving. We start at about 10:30am this morning and ended up getting back to the house just shy of 7:30pm. Time just flew.

I can remember being in Sevierville, Pigeon Forge, back Farragut...just anywhere and everywhere. But it's amazing how you can lose track even when you're not exceptionally busy.

Sad enough, we finished with one chapter left and I'll see how long that takes to finish. It was a simple but fun day.

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Other news...



I got "Transamerica" from Netflix the other day and thoroughly enjoyed it. I definitely understand why Felicity Huffman was nominated for those awards. She did an awesome job playing Bree and, I felt, was totally believable.

I learned some unknown things of the transgendered community (at least I think I did), and the whole subject matter was handled in a very respectful way.

Such an eye-opening path of discovery and it's on my must have list now.



Not only was it a great movie, but Kevin Zegers who plays Bree's son was a very nice sight to see. He did a great job with the role and I never lost sight of this boy whatever scene he was in. He demanded attention, at least for me. *Sigh* Beautiful hair, dimples, body, and those eyes. Keep an eye on this guy.

Here's a great site with tons of images of him! The Kevin Zegers Gallery

Also I thought I'd throw in a recent picture of me. Been meaning to do it for ages, at least for my purposes of documenting my growth as I work out. I've been training hard so hopefully it's paying off. ^^